Neco woke up his vision blurred and his head pounding and heart racing he was hung over he sat up his stomach rushed and he vomited on the floor he gagged and coughed up the rest of the whiskey and pizza he ate last night “fuck” he said tiredly he dragged himself out of bed stumbling to his bathroom the face of a clown came to the mirror round blue ball nose red cheeks and lips diamond face paint on his eyes and red ruby eyes poofy white and black hair neco then remembered that was him he was looking at himself he sighed moving the lose hair from his face running a finger on his sharp yellow teeth to make his finger bleed he hisses in pain as his finger tip pours crimson he looks back in the mirror as he felt his heartbeat in his ears and his body feeling like static then he threw up again in the sink the mixture of brown and green liquid swirling in the sink he coughs and sighs “god i’ma mess” he wiped the vomit off his lips and grabbed his clown suit and his neck ruffled scarf and a rainbow party hat and threw it on and threw on some black boots and fixed his hair he didn’t bother to brush his teeth there was literally no point he grabbed a bottle of vodka and poured it into a flask and hid it in his suit so he could drink out of it later and he stepped out pf his apartment into the hall and locked the door lit a cigarette as he walked his boots dragged on the carpet of the hall his steps reberberating off the walls he groaned as th headach gotten worse with every step he took he sighed out the smoke from his lungs as he reached the stairs then he went limp and tumbled down the stairs the bones in his body breaking snapping and crunching with each tumble he took he opened his eyes at the bottom of the stairs his body was broken like a slinky he sighed in dissapointment “still not dead” he muttered as he stood up his bones fixing themselves as he moved he spat out a few teeth and they regrew instantly he fixed his nose the bone making a disgusting crunching sound and he stepped out the building the morning light blinding him his headache getting worse he then threw up on the ground in front of him causing other people to stare or stop and look he kept coughing and gagging the contents of what he drank last night his heart beat ringing in his ears he groaned in pain covering his ears in pain as the ringing gotten louder and small incoherent whispers flooded his head he whines as he stumbles over his own feet his head spinning his vision blurring and he faints then vomits again but he was laying down there was no way for his vomit to escape his throat he coughs and gags the taste of his vomit filling his mouth he tries to turn over for a way to cough up the vomit he was drowning and choking in but his lungs were on fire he then blacks out he felt his body go limp his lungs burning his eyes closing but he felt his soul get sucked back into his body he coughs and vomits the rest of what he was drowning in he sat up covered in his own vomit he was shaking like a cold puppy he rolls his head to the side his lips cracking he sighs standing up “this is so fucking gross” he said wiping his lips the green and brown liquid smearing on his sleeve with faint smuges of blood aprrering on his sleeve he sighs spiting on the ground standing up he walks and knocks on a door then a mexican boy opened it up wearing something revealing he leans on the door “heh looked who showed up” the mexican boy said neco shoved him “shut up kai” kai scoffs “rude..are you drunk again?” neco shook his head “hung over and grossed out” neco said his voice wavy kai nods “i can tell there’s vomit on your shoes and sleeves" neco rolls his eyes “i know now shut up slut” kai sighs “okay look i wave myself around but i’m not THAT bad” neco covers kai’s mouth “okay just shut the fuck up now do you have my pills? I can’t get them myself since i have alcohol in my system” kai nods “si i got them you know if addicus sees me with these he’ll kick my ass” neco grabs the bottle reading the label it was his prozac he pops a pill into his mouth and swallows taking a swig of his flask to wash the pill down he plops onto the couch the razor blade in his pocket poking at his thighs kai sat next to him lighting a cigarette handing it to neco neco takes a drag and exhales smoke clouding his vision neco runs his fingers down his arms feeling bumps of old dried blood scars a sharp sting was sent through his body feeling like copper wire  neco looks at kai who was doing his makeup neco dead pans “are you really going into work tonight?” kai sighs at that “the bills don’t pay themselves and plus if i don’t addicus will kick my ass worse than he already does” neco lays on kai’s lap and kai smiles warmly petting neco’s puffy hair neco sighs feeling the prickle of his fresh slices on his bod”you cut again didn’t you?” kai asked as if reading his mind neco nods not saying anything kai pulls neco up pulling him to the bathroom kai sat neco on the toilet grabbing ointment and bandages “roll up your sleeves” kai instructed and neco hesitated “i-” neco started but then he went quiet kai kneeled in front of him “i could do it for you it’s not like i haven’t seen all of you” kai joked neco blushed flipping kai off but kai rolled up neco’s sleeves the slices were deep but not too deep but enough to to hurt kai’s breath caught in his throat neco then hold kai’s cheeks “what’s wrong a-are you alright” kai paused feeling neco’s touch but then his expression softens “yes..it’s just …not everyday i see a boy with skin like mine” kai said holding neco’s hand on his cheek blushing it was the first non-erotic touch he’s felt in a long time he hugged neco and neco hugged back squeezing as tightly as he could his eyes stinging with tears kai then pulls away rubbing the ointment on neco’s arms “ahh shit that stings!” kai sighs as neco screamed the day was only starting